October 23, 2005
Restaurant Manners
I know, I know, I have not been keeping up with this section of the website. It's been over a year since I made an entry, but that is going to change starting now. I never really knew what I wanted to do with this section and I believe I have finally figured it out.
I plan on commenting on things I observe while Lisa and I are on the road and point out how our society had spun completely out of control on certain issues. This month's topic is Restaurant Manners!!
This situation was observed in a Japanese Style Restaurant on one of our last trips. The restaurant was decorated very tastefully. It had booths and tables for the more American feel and also had low tables with pillows to sit on and shoes off for the more Oriental feel.
Lisa and I were sitting at one of the booths enjoying our sushi when we noticed that the two families who had been sitting at one of the low tables obviously had finished eating because the four young girls started running around all the low tables playing a variety of games as toll bridge , chase, and tag whoever the chosen girl of the moment was. The girls ranged in age from 2 to 8 years old. When the girls got too loud, the parents who were engaged in such deep conversation that they couldn't hear their children until thay got very loud would yell at them and tell them to come back to the table. The children would obey their parents and return to their table for about a total of a minute and a half (just long enough for the parents to start ignoring them again) and then would start the chase again. We watched several rounds of this game until the parents finally told them they had to stay around their table. The children then proceeded to play doctor along side of the table with their parents. The children continued to roll around on the floor on top of each other in ways to make any adult blush. Any adult except these parents I might add, since the parents never noticed what was going on.
Now, with all that said, I want to clarify something. I put no blame on the children for what they were doing. They just wanted to play and they surely didn't want to be stuck in some restaurant for a couple of hours while their parents visited with their friends.
Why did these parents feel the need to drag their children to something and then ignore them the entire time they were at the place they chose??
What happened to getting a babysitter when Mom and Dad want to go out and interact with adults??
What kind of messages are we sending our children when we drag them along and then ignore them and let them do whatever they want??
What happened to teaching your children how to interact in public??
What happened to boundaries??
I remember very vividly a trip to the restaurant with my Mom when I was about 10 years old. She showed me how to order when the waiter arrived at the table. She showed me how to use the napkin and put it on my lap. She took me through the whole restaurant process so I would be able to do it for myself when the time came. The biggest thing she did was BE with me. She wasn't on her cell phone, she wasn't talking to other adults and leaving me out of the conversation, she wasn't busy with anything but ME!!!
It's time for parents everywhere to make a choice. If you are going to bring your children to a restaurant, spend quality time talking with them, not on your cell phone or with your friends.
If you want to interact with the adults in your life, then do your children and the other restauranteers a favor and hire a babysitter!!!
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